Family Matters
by Chaotica
Summary: Zim gets a little information on Dibs' family.
1. Mommy

Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim. I wish I did, but I don't. So, you know, whatever.  
  
Family Matters  
  
Dib ran stumbling down the stairs. He was late, really late, so late he actually hurt.  
"Gotta go dad!" He ran out the door eyes fixed on his watch. He had about three minuets to make it to his first hour class or he was smoked.  
Professor Membrane looked up from his laptop screen that showed the mornings news. He sighed. "He's so much like his mother." He went back to his laptop and waited for his toast to finish.  
***  
Dib scurried down the hall. He had made it to school in two minuets. Panting for breath he raced to his first class.  
On his way in the door he smacked right into Zim.  
"Arg! You freak accident of the universe! Get off me!" Zim yelled pushing Dib off of him.   
Dib stood up. "Thanks for breaking my fall you green pseudo-monkey."  
Zims' eyes got squinty at the idea that he was in any way related to the Human race. "I'll!"  
"Sit down!" Miss Bitters shrieked at them.   
Both enemies zipped to their respectable desks and folded their hands on the desktops.  
Miss Bitters started into telling her students just how doomed they were and how doomed their children were when Dib got smacked in the head with a wad of paper.  
He picked it up off his desk and opened it out of curiosity.   
  
'Ever wonder about interspecies breeding?'  
  
It was scrawled on the paper in Zims' handwriting.  
Dib's face became very grim. He had a bad feeling about what Zim was leading up to and was soon deep in thought trying to figure it out when another paper ball hit him in the head.  
He opened this one too and cast a glare at Zim.  
  
'Think Gaz would mind?'  
  
Something in Dibs' obsessive mind snapped and he gripped the papers until they tore. That worthless little, a string of profanity followed. If he even looked at Gaz funny he'd kill the alien on sight.  
He scribbled down a response and nailed Zim in the head with its' return.  
Zim opened it up. He turned it upside down eyes getting wide. He looked at Dib. He had been unaware the Human could be so profane.  
***  
Dib stood guard around his sister against Zim. She got increasingly annoyed and lost him somewhere around the jungle gym during recess.  
Frustrated and afraid for her safety he was relieved when the bell to go home sounded. He stuck with her on the way home keeping an eye out for Zim. Thankfully the alien scourge had not decided to follow them.  
Once home Dib dropped his things and raced to his fathers' lab hoping he was there and not across town.   
He flung open the door and went in. "Dad! I got a question for you!"  
"Not now son, I'm trying to get this to tie right." He went back to the tennis shoe he was lacing up.  
"Uh. Dad? I really need to ask you a question." There was no real answer from his father. "It's about aliens, you know." Still nothing. "Do you think they could interbreed with Humans?"  
This got an unexpected and rather violent reaction from the professor.  
"No! Of course not! I mean, uh, no." The professor pulled at his lab coat collar. "Why what did you hear?"  
Dib looked at him blankly. "Well, you know that alien I told you about?"  
"The little green foreign kid."  
"Yeah sure. He's a real alien dad, from outer space."  
The professor stood blankly, then. "No he isn't."  
Dib raised an eyebrow. "Okay, anyway. I think he wants to interbreed with Gaz just make me mad. I can't let him do that! I was wondering if you knew if it would be possible."  
"Son." The Professor got down to his level. "There comes a time in every males life when they feel these 'urges'."  
Dib smacked his forehead. "I know about that! You told me when I was five!" He sighed. "Oh forget it." He went out the door looking defeated.  
The Professor watched his son leave then reached into his pocket and pulled out a picture. It was of a woman with violet hair, amber eyes and smooth green skin. He sighed and put it back before going to his work.  
***  
Zim cackled as he went over the reaction Dib had to his note. It had been a stroke of genius to use mention of Dibs' sister like that. He still had Dibs' reply and was thinking of framing it.  
Suddenly the screen in front of him came to life.  
"Unknown transmission." The computer said.  
Curious Zim responded. Turned out it wasn't direct at him. He patched in a hidden connection so he could watch without being noticed.  
Two separate screens lowered. One came up with the image of Professor Membrane. An odd thing considering the transmission was supposed be Irken based.   
The second screen came up with the image of a female Irken.   
Zims' antenna perked up. This was interesting.   
"Mera." The Prof. said in a way that could only be described as 'love sick'.  
"Membrane, what's wrong?" The female that Zim presumed was Mera said.  
"It's Dib. He's been chasing someone he claims is an alien. Today he came in asking about interspecies breeding."   
Mera raised a non-existent eyebrow. "Really now?" She glanced at another screen on her side. Tapping of keys could be heard. "Oh my."   
"What is it?"  
"Seems the Tallest sent Zim in that direction. This is bad, he's really incompetent but does his job." More tapping. "And he has reached Earth. Maybe that's who our little baby-kins is chasing."  
Zim boiled with rage up until the moment that Mera said 'Baby-kins'. Now he had to fight to keep from laughing.  
"He's a lot like you. He's always late."  
Mera shot him a look. "What about Gazzy? Is my little fighter pilot still playing her games?"  
The Prof. nodded. "She won't put down her GameSlave. She's got your temper too."  
"I have to cut out now Memie my little love monkey." Mera said.  
Zim looked disgusted.  
"Bye muffin."   
The transmission ended.  
Zim absorbed this vague information. The Irken female was talking about Dib and Gaz like a female fawning over her natural born children.   
His eyes got incredibly wide.  
"Dib's half Irken!" Zim screeched as he leapt up in his chair.  
Gir wandered past and lifted his arms his face split in a wide and mindless grin. "YAY!"  
"This changes everything!" Zim lowered his voice and contemplated what he could do with this new information. "So, my own enemy is a part of my race. That means he would be allowed into the empire." He jumped off his chair and started to pace.  
"But that means Gaz is half Irken too. And programmed to be a fighter pilot." That was a good thing for her. Specially programmed pilots got good jobs and saw the most action. Zim almost envied them.  
He could use this information against Dib. He may be a part of his race by blood but he would fight for Earth.   
Zim rubbed his hands together and snickered evilly. He would have fun with this.  



	2. Defender

A/N: All I can say is 'Poor Dib'.  
  
Family Matters  
  
Dib stood alone in the skool yard. It was just after the bell for the end of school. Most other students had gone already.   
"Hello, Dib."  
Dib spun around quickly almost falling over.  
"My, aren't we jumpy this afternoon." Zim said smiling maniacally.  
Dib glared. "What do you want?"  
"Oh nothing really. I was wondering though. I've seen your father, but what of your mother?" Zim asked careful to use the Earth words for the parental units.  
Dib paused. He hadn't seen his mother since he was very little. All he remembered was her violet hair, her amber eyes and her voice. But mostly her voice.  
"Why would you want to know about my mother?" Dib asked suspiciously.   
"Oh, idle curiosity I suppose." He smiled oddly. "But you know a lot about curiosity. Don't you Baby-kins?"  
Dib froze completely.   
'My little Baby-kins.' His mothers' voice echoed back at him.   
He grabbed Zim by the front of his shirt. "What did you do with my mother?" He demanded.  
Zim continued to smile and hooded his eyelids. "I've done nothing. But I do believe my superiors ordered her to take part in the newest wave of invasion. She being a prominent Invader and all."  
Zim easily slipped out of Dibs numb hands. He was enjoying this way too much.  
"You can believe me when I say this came as a surprise even to me!" Zim said pulling out a CD from his pocket. "But I scanned a few samples of your DNA I took some time ago. I was rather bored waiting to contact you from your stomach. As you can imagine." He waved the CD at Dib. "This is proof. You have Irken genes."  
Dib snapped out of it. "You're lying! You're just doing this to mess with my head!"  
"I think you should be happy about this Dib." Zim said. "This fits in with your little obsession does it not? You are the very thing you've been searching for. If that's not irony I don't know what is."  
"You have to be lying! You'd never tell me the truth on anything!"  
Zim tossed the CD at Dib. "Ask your father about Mera, and we'll see who has been telling the truth." He turned and walked away a smile plastered on his face.  
Dib picked up the CD.   
He suddenly felt very sick.  
***  
"Dad!" Dib yelled as he came into his fathers' lab. "I want to talk!"  
Professor Membrane turned. He was about to deter his son from bothering him when he saw the look on his face.  
"Who is Mera?" Dib asked unable to help but grit his teeth.  
"Mera? She's your mother son, you know that." The Prof. said.  
"You said my mother's name was Maria." Dib said. That sick feeling was coming back again.  
"Oh, that's right! Maria. That's your mothers' name. Not Mera. Nope, not at all."  
Dib raised an eyebrow. "You're telling me that Zim is right?" He stood still a moment. "No!"  
He then started to kick the wall really hard hoping to break something, be it his foot or other. "I'm not an Irken! I'm not!"  
By this time Dibs' father had concluded that his son knew about his mother being and alien. "Son. I'd like to explain."  
Dib just looked at the floor as he listened.  
His father had been start gazing one night when he was ten. A meteor had streaked across the sky, then back in the other direction then at him. It had been an Irken Voot Runner owned by a very lost female Irken named Mera.  
At first she had been very out of touch. She was an 'Invader' that had come across a space anomaly that had portaled her to Earth some how. She was very irate on finding her Voot Runner damaged.  
Dibs' father had helped her survive on earth. Helped her develop a believable disguise and name. After a time, they had fallen in love.  
But Mera had finally gotten her Voot Runner to work. Upon contacting Irk she was ordered to return by the Tallest.   
She did, even though she had been on Earth for several years and had mothered two children with her Earthen lover. It was her programmed invader duty to obey her leaders. She did keep in touch with her beloved Membrane (That would be his first and only name.(That's right it's just 'Membrane')) to hear about her children.   
Dib absorbed it all with an aura of disbelief.   
"I'm, not even Human?" Dib asked.  
"Well you're half Human." His father said.   
"That doesn't count!" Dib nearly screamed. He went back to kicking the wall. "Why didn't you tell me?" The wall was developing quite a dent.  
"Didn't think I had to. The programming your mother gave you should have explained most of it. I think."  
Dib stopped kicking the wall. "Programming?"  
Again he got to hear his father go on about something that had great relevance to his life but he had been denied knowledge of.  
Apparently Irken children were programmed before birth. Their minds instilled with the knowledge for jobs that would become their whole life. Invaders, Pilots, Secretaries, anything. It was all programmed into the small being before its' actual life began. If Dib hadn't been so in shock he would have found it interesting.  
"Gaz has been programmed for a Fighter Pilot. Mera suggested I get her the GameSlave to help her train." The Prof. said as an after thought.  
"What's my programming?" Dib asked. He was a bit afraid to find out the answer.  
"Defender." His father said. He made sure the significance was understood. "I think your mother should explain this. She's supposed to call tonight. Why don't you go play now son." The Prof. turned away back to what he was doing.  
Dib went out of the lab slowly. His mother. He'd get to talk to her. An alien.  
Then realization hit. If Zim was discovered then they might find out Dib wasn't quite Human as well. They might find out Gaz was just as bizarre.   
"I can't rely on authorities to get him off my planet. I don't care if I'm part of his race. He's not taking Earth!" He started to run to his room and promptly tripped over an untied shoelace. "Ow."  



	3. Reasons Why

  
Family Matters  
  
Dib fidgeted with his clothes and hair. He was going to talk to his mother. A person he hadn't seen, much less heard talk of, in several years.  
His father turned on a device about the size of a toaster. It looked like a TV and a Circular saw had been slammed together.  
The screen came to life and a face came into view.  
Dibs' stomach tightened.   
She was green with solid amber eyes. Her antenna curled back but twitched a bit when she saw him.  
"Dib!" She squealed. "Membrane, what's going on?"  
"Dib's found out." The Prof. said.   
"Oh." She paused. "Well then. Hello Dib." She smiled at her son.  
"Mom?" Was all he could manage. "You're, you're." He fell silent.  
"Oh baby-kins, I know it's hard but it's true. You're half Irken. You should be proud of what you are."   
"But I'm a freak!" Dib almost exploded at his mother. "I've been looking for aliens my whole life! Then I find out I have one in my school." He started pacing. "Now I find out I'm a half-breed!" He turned back to her. "What am I supposed to do now?"  
"You're programming should tell you that." Mera said.  
"What is my programming anyway?" Dib asked. He cast a look to his father who had remained silent.  
"A defender is supposed to protect the planet or area they are born on or in." His mother said sounding like she was merely quoting a book. "See? That's why you fight Zim."  
"So, you're telling me the only reason I notice that Zim is an alien is because I'm supposed to?" He asked.   
"Yes."  
He blinked. "Okay..."  
"Don't you worry my little baby-kins. Everything will be fine." Mera said with a sort of giggle in her voice.   
"But what about the invasion?"   
"Oh, don't worry about that." She waved her hand. "Everything is fine on that end. You should probably still keep at Zim though. He's a voracious little thing at times."  
Dib nodded and kicked at the floor. "Mom?"  
"Yes Dibby?" She asked.  
"Why did you leave?" He looked up at the screen.  
She sat back in her chair. "Dib, I'm an Invader. I follow the orders given to me by my leaders. I had no choice but to return when they called for me."  
"Oh."  
"Come on my little Defender-wender. Perk up! It's not so bad! I still love you." She smiled in a half-manic way.   
Dib silently wondered if any of her personality was in him.  
A frown crossed her face. "Oops, gotta run. I'll talk to you later baby-kins! By Memie-baby!" She waved at Membrane.  
"By Sugar-lump." He responded before the screen turned off.  
Dib sighed and left the lab half-heartedly making his way to his room.  
***  
Zim watched Dib from his side of the classroom. The Human had been giving him curious looks all day but had yet to antagonize him.  
So, Dib believed him. Good.  
At Lunch Zim sat at his table as always but was surprised when Dib joined him.  
"Don't say anything Zim. I'm only here to know why." He looked up from the disgusting excuse for food on his plate. "Why did you tell me?"  
Zim smirked. "Just to see your reaction. Dib."  
"Is that the only reason?"  
Zim paused. "I doubt this will count for anything but I am ordered to re-claim any lost members to the Irken Empire I come across during a mission. Though seeing you like that. It was priceless." He grinned maniacally.  
Dib picked at his food. "So. I suppose you were programmed to be an Invader. Right?"  
Zim coughed. "You know of that?"  
Dib nodded solemly "My mother, I spoke with her. She said I was a 'Defender'."  
Zims' eyes got unusually large, even for him. "Was that female insane?" He demanded in a high voice.   
By now some of the other kids had noticed his rant but chose to ignore him.  
"What? She just said I was made to try and."  
"Defender programming was made illegal before even the Tallest were born!" Zim screeched. A sudden look of fear crossed his face. "And you were given it." He slowly slid out of his seat and took a hold of his tray. He paused keeping his eyes on Dib before running away faster than Dib had ever seen the little alien menace go.  
Dib, now alone, blinked and sighed.   
That wasn't exactly a good sign.  



	4. Brother, Brother

Family Matters  
  
Zim paced in his lab. What had that female been thinking? Defender programming was dangerous!  
The reason it had been outlawed had been the destructive nature of that program. Based on protection it also caused intense jealousy in the Irken, in this case half-breed. The jealousy could erupt when an invasion of the defenders planet or protectorate was initiated.   
In other words, if Zim continued his invasion he was more than toast. He was toast-crumbs.   
"This explains even more. Perhaps if I convince Dib to be on my side." He paused. "No! He would never do that!" He went back to pacing.   
He took some steps to his communicator that was linked to Irk. "I should tell the Tallest about this." He put a hand over the keys. "They'll fix this."  
He keyed in the link to activate. Instead of reaching the tallest he found Mera glaring back.  
"Hello Zim." She chirped. "You wouldn't happen to be about to tell good ol' Purple and Red about my little boy. Now are you?" She gave him a look he immediately feared.  
"Um, no! Of course...not." He shrank down a bit then remembered his rank and straightened up.  
"Well, anyway. I'm jamming your transmissions until I arrive. I'm almost there." She adjusted a few controls on the Voot Runner she was in.  
"What?" Zim nearly screamed.   
She nodded. "I'll be there by tomorrow."  
"But it took me six months to get here!" Zim said. He felt like he was being shown up here.  
"Yes but you wandered around for a good five months now didn't you."  
He laughed nervously. "I uh..."  
She glanced away from the screen. "Oops, gotta go." The screen went dark.  
Zim tried to re-contact Irk but he only got static. "Brashikvaning Female!" He screeched. I won't translate, that's dirty.  
***  
  
The Next Night  
  
Dib sat quietly on the roof of his house watching the moon go from one side of the sky to the other.   
Not long ago the sky he now stared at gave him a mystery. Now that he knew a part of that mystery, and knew that he himself was part of it, it only brought him emptiness.   
His mother was a sickeningly sweet but almost emotionless alien. His father wasn't much better, but he was human. Gaz was no help and the only person he could get any answers from was he mortal enemy.  
His life couldn't be any worse.  
"So this is how you spend your time is it? Pathetic, even for something that's only half Human."  
Dib sat up quickly. "What are 'you' doing here?" He demanded glaring hard at Zim.  
"Oh nothing. I just wanted to do a test." Zim said.  
Dib couldn't see his Voot Runner or Gir, or anything else that would spell trap. Even though Zims' sudden appearance did scream it, he was curious.  
"Test?"  
"Yes Dib." Zims' face took on a sinister look. "I am here to invade your planet. To take it for it's resources then throw it away when I am done." He paused watching Dibs' reaction.   
Dibs' right eye began to twitch.  
"I am also here to take your race into slavery. To take you into slavery, far from here. Earth will be mine."  
"I won't let you." Dib said.  
Zim tilted his head. He hadn't quite caught what Dib had said. "What was that?"  
"I won't let you!" The explosion of temper had been a bit more than Zim had expected.  
Until now Zim had not told Dib of his plans full force like that. The 'Defender' programming must not have caught it even though Dib had.  
Dib suddenly rushed him, both of them landing hard on the roof. He shook Zim hard. "You leave Earth! Do you understand me? Leave it alone!"   
Zims' spider legs came out and pulled Dib off of him. "Stop squirming! I had to test the strength of your programming!"  
Dib relaxed but stayed suspended in the air by Zims' spider legs. "So, you won't do all that stuff you said?"  
"Um...no."  
"Liar!" Dib began to thrash around again trying to get free.  
"Alright Zim put your brother down."  
Zim recognized that voice.   
Dib did too.  
"Mom?" Dib asked. "But you're, you're back on, aren't you?" He mangled his sentence but she seemed to understand.  
"Not any more my little baby-kins!" She was maybe half a foot shorter than the professor. That fact alone made Zim uneasy.  
Zim set Dib down. "What do you mean by 'brother'?"  
Mera walked across the roof to the two rivals. "You weren't in the 'altered genetics ward', were you Zim." It was more a statement than a question.  
"No." He said not quite understanding. Zim was one of those rare Irkens created through harvested egg and sperm. He had parentals even if he didn't know who they were. He was still grown in a tube and trained like any other Irken.   
She knelt down beside them. "You put it together."  
Suddenly it snapped into place. "You!" He nearly shrieked. "But, but!"  
"Zim you know as well as I do that I would have had at least some of my reproductive cells removed when I was young." Mera said. She patted Dib on the head. "My you got taller."  
Zims' eyes fluttered shut and he collapsed forward being caught by an automatic response in his spider legs.  
Dib stared first at his mother, then at Zim, then back at her. "You mean he's my, my, Zims' my brother?"  
Mera nodded. "Yes. That's right. Well Half-brother anyway." She smiled at him.  
Dibs' eyes rolled back and he too fainted only it was Mera who caught him.  
"Oh dear. Membrane!"  
"Yes lovie?" Membrane asked as he unexplainably poked his head up above the roofs edge.   
"They've both fainted. Help me get them inside."  
"Of course Love muffin!"   
"Thanks Sugar Baby." She gave him a quick kiss.  
Mera picked up Zim while Membrane picked up Dib. They carried them both inside to wait for them to wake up.  



	5. She Came Home

A/N: Midnight writing is fun!  
  
Family Matters  
  
Dibs' eyes opened slowly. A tall, but familiar figure stood over him.   
"Dad? Oh man, I had this horrible nightmare that mom was an alien and Zim was my." He sat up and stopped mid sentence. "Aw crap!"  
His mother sat on the sofa with her hands folded in her lap. Zim sat beside her looking disgruntled. Neither of the two wore their Human disguises.   
"Hello sweety!" Mera chirped.  
"This is an outrage!" Zim yelled. "Of all the Humans on this planet I have to be his brother?"  
Mera looked to Membrane and smiled. Without turning back to Zim she smacked the small male on the back of the head. "Don't be mean Zim."  
Zim rubbed his head and gave her a begrudging look.  
The front door came open and Gaz came in. Everyone turned and watched her walk past the doorway to the living room. Then watched her walk back and stare in.  
"Gazzy!" Mera leapt up and immediately hugged her daughter.  
"Mom!" Gaz latched on to her and was picked up by her mother. "Wait." She leaned back and looked her mother over. "What happened to you?"  
"Oh, Gazzy, I'm an Irken, just like Zim." She smiled sweetly as if it were no big deal.  
A distressed sound escaped Gaz. "You mean Dib was right? No!"  
"I think you're missing the big picture here Gaz." Dib said angrily. "Our mother is an alien, that makes us half bloods."  
Gazs' only reaction was to glare at Dib then hug her long lost mother some more.  
"That's not all." The Professor said standing up. He held what looked like a remote in one hand.  
"Oh no, not more of this!" Dib rubbed his head. "This is like a nightmare that won't end."  
"Oh come now son! It's not so bad. Look!" He pointed the remote at Dib and pressed a button.  
Dibs' body shook. "What was that?" He noticed that Zim was staring open mouthed at him.  
Mera, still carrying Gaz, handed him a hand mirror.   
He looked in the mirror, rubbed his eyes, then smacked himself. "I'm green!"  
It was true, his skin was a pale green, eyes were solid amber and two antenna stuck out from under his spiky hair.  
Gaz smirked at him as her mother set her down. Membrane did the same to her. She looked relatively the same. Pale green skin, solid amber eyes, though her antenna were slightly shorter than Dibs'.  
"We used Solid Holographic imaging to change how you looked so you would survive better here." Mera said.  
Zim jumped off the couch and inspected Dib.   
So, this supposed Human was his brother and because of programming was still his rival. Wonderful. He knew this planet was complicated but he didn't know it would affect his own life so drastically.  
"What am I supposed to do now?" Zim asked in his 'angry' voice. "I'm an Invader!" He noticed the facial tick had returned to Dib when he said that. Probably best to stay away from this topic but he had to know what to do. "How am I supposed to do my job when I have a Defender to worry about?" He motioned dramatically to Dib. "And one I'm related to of all things!"  
"Well, you could always observe instead." Mera said as she and Gaz sat on the abandoned couch with Membrane.  
"Never! I'm an In..." He paused almost too late to stop himself from setting Dib off again. "Are you insane female?" Zim finally demanded.  
"I am your maternal unit young man, you will address me as such." Mera scolded. "Though you are welcome to use the Earthen word." She was suddenly calmer. "Besides, since my little Dibby is here this planet is technically under Irken command."  
Zim looked shocked. "What?"   
Dib snickered at Zim. "So I guess I beat you to it eh Zim?"  
Zim started to make inarticulate noises that were more than likely meant to be profane. In fact I bet you could hear his mind snapping over the very idea of Dib conquering Earth before he did.  
"Breath in Zim." Mera said.  
Zim forced himself to start breathing again though speech was beyond him at the moment.  
"I missed you mom." Gaz said. She hadn't let go of her mother yet and wasn't planning to.  
"Awww, my little baby girl." Mera cooed.   
Membrane, who was sitting on the other side of Gaz, hugged the both of them and made a family picture that Kodak would have killed to have.   
"I think I'm going to be ill." Zim said looking disgusted by all of this. "How could you have lowered yourself to." He shuddered. "Breeding with a creature such as this?" He motioned to Membrane who didn't look the least bit insulted.  
Not much actually gets through all that genius if you ask me.  
"You'll understand when you're older." Mera replied.   
Zim stopped then turned to Dib who was inspecting his new skin color. "'This' is our mutual maternal unit?" He asked with an edge of sarcasm in his voice.  
Dib shrugged.   
"Now." Mera said standing up. "I don't want you two fighting over world conquest, you understand me?"   
"Yes mother." Zim and Dib said in unison.  
"Good." She glanced at her 'watch'. "Oops! Time to go to bed." She glanced at Membrane who had gotten up as well.   
"You boys go, um, to your rooms, you too Gaz." The Professor said hurridly.  
"But I don't live here." Zim said looking at the two taller beings like they were cracked.  
But they weren't listening and were already half way up the stairs carrying on like hormone driven teenagers.  
Gaz picked up her Game Slave and headed for her room.  
"Gaz wait!" Dib said catching her arm. "Aren't you weirded out by finding out you're half alien?"  
She shook her head. "Nope. Now let go before I pound you. Just be happy mom's home." She shook Dib off and disappeared up the stairs.  
Dib held his head trying his best to straighten things out in his mind. "This has got to be one of the strangest nights of my life."  



End file.
